These grudges can destroy you!  A grudge against God.  A grudge against another human.  A grudge against yourself.  So God did not do it your way!  Let go of your desire for control and let God be God!  So someone offended you?  Let go of your grudge against your neighbor by forgiving!  So you are upset with yourself because you can’t undo what you did?   Let go of your self anger and trust the One who has forgiven your sins!

“And above all things have fervent love among yourselves: for love shall cover the multitude of sins.  Use hospitality one to another without grudging.” 1 Peter 4:8-9